DELILAH: Hello Bonella. May I say your bones look lovely. I do appreciate you taking the time to interview me, you must be a very busy... ghoul? or something else? I admit that puzzle is very interesting.
BONELLA: Hello dear...wait...um...Goddess of Art Covers? What, you like wrap yourself in paint and roll on a canvas? Are you a bit nutty? Eccentric? What's up with that title?
DELILAH: Well I don't like to wrap myself up in paint and roll around on canvas - can't stand stuff like that makes me run for the shower.
BONELLA: Thought it smelled in here...
DELILAH: But I am nutty, eccentric, dark, and twisted but a good artist must be all those things. As for the title - it was given to me. I just try to live up to it. Sorry about the "L" word, didn't mean to be insulting.
BONELLA: Don't worry...sticks and stones may all that crap...Okay, so I looked at your covers...not bad...loved The Bonehead...no...The Bone Lord, reminded me of my pops. Checked you out. You write and you draw and you go to school and you have time to workshop about book trailers...what are you? A shape-shifting time traveler? Got some free passes from my demon pals to get this accomplished?
DELILAH: Why thank you, Bonella. The Bone Lord was a fun cover to do. How is your father? As for me I'm just a poor human with a bad case of ADD. But being a time traveling shape shifter sounds fun! Know one you could send over to recruit me?
BONELLA: As if...
DELILAH: Well I can make you some up on photoshop but don't know if they'd work but we could give it a try.
FANG BUD: She don't look like no shape-shifter to me...smells too pukey good...veins nice and big...
DELILAH: Come on over here, Fang Bud, aren't you an interesting fellow. Did I mention I like Vampires too?
BONELLA: Lea's gonna whip our butts if we hurt this one so put those sharpies away. Miz Stephans, I hear you have the hots for a Jimmy. Are you so crazed to fall in love with a cover character? What makes this man so special?
DELILAH: Oh no not the hots for him. I just love that he photographs well and takes a variety of pictures. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to find Regency Era images?
BONELLA: Like I care?
DELILAH: Sometimes I pull my hair out trying to find images to do the cover.
BONELLA: Explains the wig...
DELILAH: As for what makes Jimmy special... well he is a hottie and very sweet in the email conversations we have had - but I have this thing for bad boys.
FANG BUD: Just a taste?
DELILAH: I'm A positive. To tell ya the truth the blood bank said I had puny veins - but if you're willing to make me a vampire - and only if I can look like my younger self I'm game.
BONELLA: Later. Today is October 31st, and as you can tell the spirit world is in a bit of a frenzy of emotional unrest so I need to wrap this up quickly before harm comes to you. What pleasure do you get from designing covers for these...Muse (what a typical name) writers?
DELILAH: I appreciate that Bonella. Have you met the hero of my June release from MuseitHot? A very sexy ghost. Oh wait you were asking about covers.
BONELLA: You know, with a gutter mind like yours you'd fit in our crypt perfectly.
DELILAH: What I enjoy is the challenge of creating a cover that teases the readers and slipping in a few subliminal clues as to what is going on. I want them when they look at the cover after reading it to go - I didn't see that! Besides if I'm sitting at the computer for 12 hours a day I might as well be productive.
BONELLA: I don't know why but you're just not nerving up my bones like the rest of your crew this month. Maybe I'm just tired...yeah right... if you could murder just one Muser...
BONELLA: Allow me to finish my question PUHLEASE! GEEZ, woman...if you could murder just one Muser do you think the act would find its way onto a cover?
LEA: What kind of a question is that?
FANG BUD: Answer it. Can't wait, answer, answer, answer...Ouch. That hurt!
DELILAH: Oh well I'll admit I've had some that I wanted to strangle - but got past it and managed to create a cover for them. Funny how those seem to end up being my favorites.
BONELLA: Great, she calls me evil and whacks Fang over the head. Okay...if you were dying and had one last chance to give it your all would you pick writing a book or designing a cover? Lame human question. Pukesville.
DELILAH: I love doing them both! As a writer I'm kind of slow - it can take me years to finish a book. Why, I got so mad at one character I put the book aside for 2 years before going back to it. Covers are a few days work and I get to show them off!
BONELLA: You've been a boring blast and want to thank you for curing my wakefulness. Perhaps you can devise a formula and sell this for insomniacs, call it D Sleep More Pills?
DELILAH: I'd recommend Trazadone it's what the doctor gives me for my insomnia.
LEA: Thank you, Delilah, for--
BONELLA: Excuse me...who died and made you hostess? Thank you, dear Queen of Covers for allowing me the privilege of...anyone got Scope?...interviewing you...as the last author of this event we, the ghouls and I, will finally finish this festival in the style most appropriate for us...coming up later tonight.
FANG BUD: Can I ask a question? I want to find out if this pretty lady here has any blood disease...--drool--are you married? Wanna remain married? Ever thought of being one of the undead? What do you write?
DELILAH: Fang Bud - No blood diseases, I am married and I like the hubby I have a lot. He's been my personal hero several times - but if you want a meal, contact me later and I'll give you the name of someone you can eat. Yes I have thought about being one of the undead - I'm a night owl - would rather sleep during the day and be awake all night. I write mostly paranormal romances. Let's see, I've written a time travel story, a dragon shifter story, a vampire story, a story about an incubus cambion, a ghost story and in the works is a story about a witch who inadvertently pulls the hero from the late 1700s into 2011, a story about a police detective, a serial killer and the heroine is Death, with my writing buddy Antonia Tiranth we're in the process of building a world where vampires, ghouls, shapeshifters, ghost, elves and the four horsemen of the Apocalypse all interact.
BONELLA: Like you musta failed math. One question? Just answer him or else he'll go on and on...
DELILAH: LOL! Oh, Bonella, he's not bothering me. At least he asked them all at one time and I managed to answer them all in one paragraph... unlike email where I often have to send multiple emails to answer all the questions.
I had fun! Let's do this again sometime, maybe next October?
BONELLA: Yeah, sure, fun fun fun...door's thaddaway...oh, and don't forget, Fang will be waiting for you in the lane for a little bite...artists...crazy bunch...anyone have a spare barf bag?