Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Bonella rips Muse Author and Editor A New One!











BONELLA: I am thrilled to introduce a nutball who loves dragons. This is better than that horse gal. At least it’s a creature I can relate with. So, why the big hook up with dragons?

ANTONIA: Don't knock the dragons. Besides have you ever heard "Beware of dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup" though in your case you'd make a good toothpick I guess.

BONELLA: I have a delete button, remember that.

ANTONIA: I’ve always felt a connection to dragons. The first tarot deck I could easily read was the Celtic Dragon deck. Its hard to explain. They just call to me.

BONELLA: The word underground is that you and this cover goddess...yeah right pukesville goddess...have written or collaborated on another book or two? Now why would you hook up with someone who draws when you have dragons in your life?

ANTONIA: (LOL) Watch it! Del and I are twins separated by birth and time. She’s pushed me to be a better writer. I owe her a lot.

BONELLA: Owe her a lot? Okay, if that's how you see it. Not only are you into dragons but elves? Woman, can’t you find a human? What’s up with these otherly creatures? Are you normal?

ANTONIA: Gods, no. And I love being that way. I’m having a great time being interviewed by a bag of bones, so yeah, definitely not normal. Got a problem with it?

BONELLA: Feisty little gal aren't you. How much do you love your red editor’s pen? I mean, do you piss off writers? Or do they push you around like a raggedy ann doll?

ANTONIA: I love it! Bleeding all over the paper, it's pretty don't you think? I don’t think I’ve pissed anyone off…yet. It's bound to happen though.

BONELLA: If you could kill one author—

MUMMSY BITTER: Now you’re on my good side again.

BONELLA: Thanks, Mummsy.

LEA: And I have my eraser ready to delete both of you.

BONELLA: Where the heck does that woman pop in from?

MUMMSY BITTER: Don’t worry about her. There’s something waiting for her at the end of this monthly gig.

BONELLA: oh neato! Where was I? Oh yeah...atchscray that question since Miss Party Pooper won’t let me ask which author you’d love to strangle. Hmm...let’s see now...SHOOT! I really wanted to hear that answer but let’s move on to something more humanly tamed: What the heck do you do as an editor?

ANTONIA: Awww…party poopers huh? Well, basically I go through looking for plot holes and grammatical issues (though I’ll be honest, I’m not good with commas!). I help authors clean and tighten their writing.

BONELLA: You writing more books cuz if you are let me know to take out a fresh barf bag.

ANTONIA: Grab your barf bag then, cause you bet I am. Del and I have some ideas we’ve been kicking around for awhile and I’ve got a few more of my own. You might even like a few of our characters.

BONELLA: Well, loved the dragons and elves and then you were once again like the rest...B.O.R.I.N.G. There’s the door—

LEA: Thank your guest for spending time with you.

BONELLA: yeah, right, as if it was a pleasure for me.

LEA: Bonella...delete...delete...

BONELLA: Everyone heard that right? Threatening me. Where’s my rights?

Thank you for being my guest now please take the exit.

11 comments:

Karen McGrath said...

Wow Boney baby, you are getting tough. Poor Tir, pay no attention to the bag behind the slasher words, LOL!

Um, Bonella, my turn soon. Heh, heh, heh. Face off! Oh, wait, you already have that...

:) :) :)

Roseanne Dowell said...

Great job, Antonia. You handled the spindly creature really well. Why she thinks she can mess with us Muse authors (and editors) is beyond me.

M. L. Archer said...

ROFL!!! Bonella, you're just sick. Great interview, Antonia. But you should have brought your dog and played fetch with Bonella's fibula.

Heather Haven said...

Jeeesh, Bonella, you are beyond ANNOYING. Maybe if you were as talented as the rest of the authors, you wouldn't be so mad all the time. Life is short, sweetie, take a break, take a writing class, take a valium.

MuseItUp Publishing said...

BONELLA: Excuse me M.L. Archer but who the heck are you again?

And thank you, Miz Haven, annoying is my second name. And I am a talented author. You are reading my interviews, are you not?

Lin said...

Heather, part of the Bonebags problems is that she HASN'T any life to live...so for her life isn't short...it's ancient history.

Antonia Tiranth is one of my editors and I love that she tightens up my words, so Antoinia, don't worry about rattling OUR bones. You just keep up the excellent work.

As for you,Boney, guess you didn't take my advice and slather on the HYDROCORTISONE CREAM. Do you need a dustpan and brush for your...uhhh, cleanup of that last encounter with...you know who obviously ISN'T anymore? That poor old thing, bumping bones is dangerous without the cream when you get to be YOUR age.

Ginger Simpson said...

I've often heard that lack of sex makes some people cranky. I'm pretty much assuming that's what's up with Bonella. No man in his right mind...even a pervert, would want to come close to her. She makes a knothole in a fence look more appealing. Loved the "face off" comment.

Antonia said...

lol you guys are great hugs all around!

Susanne Drazic said...

Fun interview.

Charlie said...

Go Lea! Just don't get your fingers caught in her rib bones as you're pushing Bonella forward. Fun piece. Thanks for sharing!

Killarney said...

Boy, that bag of bones gets cheekier by the day doesn't she? Lea will kick her moldy bones back to the graveyard by the end of October, you can count on that!