Friday, December 3, 2010
NAT CRACKER: Hear there's a party...really...where? All I see are five pound loafs of broken sticks.
MERRY WHITE: Tis the season to be jolly...fa la la la la la la la la...
NAT CRACKER: Merry, didn't your shrink tell you you need to go back into your room and stay there?
MERRY WHITE: I'm dreaming of a White Christmas...
NAT CRACKER: No, dear lady, that's you're dreaming of a White Padded Cell.
SIMON SNOWBALL: H-H-ey, st-st-t-t-op pi-picking on h-h-er!
NAT CRACKER: Simon, the day you speak English I'll do what you say. So where was I...oh yeah, Fond Christmas Memories...Christmas Downunder, like what do you mean? You celebrate under the mattress?
What's the big deal with Christmas?
SIMON SNOWBALL: I-it's a-a-ab-ab-out fa-fa-fam-ily--
SUGAR CANE: and sweets, and candy canes, and gifts, and snowballs, and love, and sharing!
NAT CRACKER: Sugar, do you want me to show you the right way to chew on a candy cane?
PENNY POINSETTA: Now, Nat, I remember not too long ago a few teardrops shedding on someone's wooden body when Rudolph finally made it into Santa's sleigh group.
NAT CRACKER: Oh, hi, Penny...um...those were melting snowballs Sugar had shot in my face.
PENNY POINSETTA: Yes, of course they were, dear. Now, as hosts we must remember the holiday season is about good cheer and remembering those less fortunate than us.
NAT CRACKER: Exactly, that's why I'm going to show Merry and Sugar how to shove those candy canes deep in their throats in one shot...I mean why waste time chewing when you can simply enjoy the whole enchilada in one shot.
PENNY POINSETTA: And risk choking?
NAT CRACKER: Hey, it's the thought that counts.
MERRY WHITE: We wish you a Merry Christmas, We wish you a Merry Christmas, We wish you...
NAT CRACKER: ... to shut the heck up, and a Happy New Year!!
Posted by MuseItUp Publishing at 11:47 AM