(Azin wipes his eyes from the tears from laughing hysterically)
Holy crap, you all truly think you have a chance in "jockying" for a position? Yeah, for the one lucky enough to pick the scum off my boot, daily. Or if you're good lookin'...perhaps something else? Grrrrr...
Listen, I don't have a bunch of time to chat with the rest of you. I'm still dodging assassins, the Drechmar Secret Police from my very own realm of Maugal Deep, and foulskin war bands. Yippie. Did I earn this? Heck no! Well, until my family was murdered to make a point, I had to obey until I became fed up with the Maugal Deep's path. Yeah, yeah, don't be surprised. I do have a heart...somewhere. And no, don't expect me to be lovie-dovie and recite poetry, or I'll skewer you and get drunk while reclining on your corpse.
For those of you who think you want to fight me, I have never lost a fight...and never will: knife, bow, I really don't care. You're going to lose anyway. Besides, I'll drop you at a hundred yards before your stench offends my nostrils. Pardon me. (Azin combs his thick mane and sips some ale as he eyes several of the attractive Muse female characters waiting in the wings).
Ahem, I got be going. But, I won't be gone.