Wednesday, May 11, 2011

The Making of Memories

My Mom
I love reading all the posts about our moms and the wonderful (and not so wonderful, but real) memories of our time with them. It makes me wonder what my kids will remember from their time spent with me. I wonder if they’ll remember the time I ruined Thanksgiving dinner and drove all over town until we found an open restaurant so they wouldn’t starve to death (oh, the drama). Or will they remember the dust bunnies that loved to grow in the corners of our kitchen (we have two, large dogs—‘nuff said). I know they won’t remember the nights I spent watching them sleep or the hours I spent relearning how to multiply multi-digit numbers using some strange box with lines.

I hope they don’t remember the time I lost my patience and fussed like a mad-woman over the Cheeto fingerprints on the wall or the time I refused to fold the laundry for a week (no one noticed—how does that happen?).

But how can I stack the deck in my favor?

Would you mind if we took a moment and talked about what goes into creating those memories. How do we enrich the lives of our kiddos so when someone asks them to reflect on their favorite moments with us, they’ll have to sift through a pile of memories so sweet it’ll give them a toothache?

When my children were younger—as in preschool age—I was so good with organized playgroups, bright-colored birthday parties, and planned family time. Yah, I was that mom. But now my children are older and I’ve turned into a mom-slacker. I’ve tried to remind my kiddos about the chocolate pudding finger-painting, but they don’t remember any of it. I don’t want to have to redo all that hard work, besides I’m not so sure my eighteen year-old would be game to play with her pudding anymore. *Sigh*

So now what? Resign to memories that barely hit the sweetness scale? Say it isn’t so. What I could really use is a phenomenal list of memory-provoking activities I can do with my disgruntled masses. Cause let’s face it, I’m too old and too tired to think that stuff up all by myself. So what do you say? Shall we do it together?

Yay. So glad you’re in. First, use the comment section below to list the best things you did with your mom during your middle years (let’s say that’s when you were 7 to 18 years of age). Later I’ll post a list of those suggestions along with a few resources found online (so you can print it out and keep it with you at all times). Then we’ll end the day with some Mom encouragement.

Ready? Go.


Sharon Sullivan-Craver said...

Your blog is so well put. And I do recall fond (and not so fond) memories of my childhood and young adulthood. By retelling them it keeps memories alive. Thank you so much for sharing, I really enjoyed it.

Roseanne Dowell said...

I loved your blog. At this point, I hear all too often what my children remember. Is it the days we spent at Amusement parks with my sister's, their families, and my mother? Or the vacations at a cottage at the lake? Heck no, I hear all about how mean I was. What memories do I have of my mother during those teenage years?Truthfully not many. Hey, I was busy. I had friends, I didn't want to hang with my mother. But do I have earlier memories. Oh yeah. But they didn't come back to me until I had children of my own and tried to instill those memories in them. I'm sure when I'm gone, my kids memories will change and they'll find some fond memories to talk about. At least I hope so.

Charlie said...

Great post. I think we really remember the 'good' times with our mothers when we grow wise enough to figure out what matters. Sometimes it does take losing the precious mother before we finally figure it out. thanks for sharing.
C.K. Volnek

Nancy Bell said...

Morning Shellie, thought provoking blog today. Funny how some people remember only the good stuff and some only the bad. one thing I remember is my mom always took us to the Canadian National Exhibition (CNE) every August. It was like the official end of summer for us.
Thanks for sharing with us. :~)

Anonymous said...

Beautiful pictures of both you and your mom, Shellie.
My mom didn't really do much with us during our middle years...we made up our own stuff with the those are some memories (grins). Mom was a sweetie none the less, just more involved in visiting friends and sharing the kids.

Shellie said...

Sharon, so true. The retelling cements those memories better than any video tape, doesn't it (plus its more fun to do at the dinner table--when the boy/girlfriends are around:D)

Roseanne, I hear you. Somehow everything is my fault when it goes south. Can't figure out how that happens, but they remember something I've done which brought about the drama. Man, if I had half that creativity, you know.;)

Shellie said...

Thank you Charlotte. I hope the remembering is sweet and precious for you!

Hi Emily. What fun! Sounds like a perfect way to cap the summer.

I have friends who celebrate the end of summer with a bit of sorrow (end of carefree days with their kiddos) and others who celebrate the promise of fall (the beginning of school and the return of mommy free time). A bit of a conundrum for me:)

Shellie said...

Thank you Kay Dee. Mom found her High School Senior picture a little bit ago and I just couldn't resist :).

And ah-yes, neighborhood memories. I think this generation is missing out on some wicked-good fun with all their technology. Could there be better adventures than those you have on a hot, summer day exploring the woods/field/pond or daring each other to go into THAT neighbor's yard. You know--the one who yells at you if he catches you near his precious grass :D. Hee-hee-hee.

J.Q. Rose said...

The one thing I remember is shopping for a dress when I was in 8th grade. I was a princess for our small town's fall festival. I found a gorgeous peach satin, organza, etc. dress that was perfect. I begged and begged for it and finally told her I would wear it to every high school prom. I imagine she knew I was desperate and would probably never remember my promise. I didn't keep the promise and I think I still feel guilty about that! Anyway, I looked great and she sparkled when she saw me on the stage. So I imagine, shopping with my mom would be the activity I remember in middle grades.

Shellie said...

JQ What a wonderful memory. I have to ask...whatever became of that dress?